The Matrix

I jus’ finished with a new group today and I loved every min of it. There were people in this particular group that I could relate to wholeheartedly. While I can’t speak of specifics due to confidentiality, I can tell you it’s a group of addicts. We are all one in some form or another. What? You don’t think you are? I guarantee there are way more addicts in the world than some may actually think. Jus’ because your not addicted to any specific drug doesn’t make you ‘not’ an addict. There are numerous things which people can be addicted to. Sex, pornography, drugs, alcohol, money, gambling, hustling, hoarding, food, jus’ about anything that you can’t see yourself ‘not’ doin’ or to be without ((no, I’m not talkin about the things you have to have in life in order to survive)) is an addiction.


Don’t like hearing the truth speak to you from this post I wrote? Coming from the mind of an actual drug addict?

In my honest opinion, I think if you didn’t read this post and hear an actual addict tell you. If you knew someone was a drug addict, and you weren’t? I’ll bet you’d not ask their advice or for their help with shit you got going on yourself. They might be an addict but you probably don’t even know.

My mother has never been a drug addict her entire life, but she’s addicted to watching her soaps ((soap operas for the one’s not knowing what I meant)). I don’t think an entire afternoon has gone by without her watching “Days Of Our Lives”. That may seem a lil funny and it probably is. I know I hated being made to go take a nap everyday when her show came on. It was so she could watch it without me causing her a distraction. If she missed anything from one of her soaps you sure as shit didn’t wanna be the one that caused it. I’m jus glad I learned early on not to bother her during her only peaceful time to herself throughout the day. Oh, no worries I was little and caused plenty of distractions, but she never really got on to me, got on to me, if I got up to get a drink, or use the bathroom. Of course those were the distractions she didn’t want me making but it was only because I wanted to see what was so important to her that I had to go to sleep so that she could watch. But still it goes without saying she was addicted to watching her TV shows everyday throughout the week.

It wasn’t a drug but that doesn’t mean she wasn’t addicted to following her favorite series.

((Above and before any other things I’m gonna list that I’m addicted to is being the proud mother of 2 grown ass kids. With the newest addition to our family, my grandson. Lukah Neal Spees. My husband, and kids, and now my grandson are what I’m addicted to before anything else. I’ll never put anything before them.))

((There are other things out there I’m even more addicted to than any fuckin drug. Example #1: I’m addicted to reading. I love reading. If there were no books in the world I’d wanna try to write the very first one. To show other people how far a person’s imagination can go. ‘No limits’ when it comes to pen and paper man. Free canvas. Ya know? Example #2: I absolutely love to write. Coincidence? That it goes with being able to read? I think so.

Needless to say I was pleased with the new group. There were a lot of people that I could relate to. I heard someone ask if a person had to have that ‘want to attitude’ in order to quit. But some people don’t and sadly never will.

I have a lot more things I need to write about. I just want everone to know I’m gonna be here if anyone needs to talk. I usually work from 6am-1 or 2pm and it’s only like a 5-7 min drive home from my job. I’ll be updating my contact information soon. I say my prayers every night. So please know that just because we don’t know one another, doen’t mean I haven’t prayed for you.

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